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Destined to Win
Q: My child just entered pre-school and I was speaking
with some parents about a notion called “self-fulfilling
prophecy,” which can cause young children to develop
positive or negative behaviors according to how others react
to them and interpret their abilities. How can I ensure that
my child will have a positive view of himself and thus be
successful in life and surpass the competition?
A: Legendary Lighthouse
The Cape Florida Lighthouse is the oldest structure in Dade
County. Located at the southernmost point of Key Biscayne
in Bill Baggs Park, the original lighthouse and cottage was
built in 1825. Today, rangers guide visitors on scheduled
tours of the furnished cottage complete with a mini-theatre
that projects the history of the lighthouse and the area.
Remember t he
mov ie Scarface ?
T he fa mou s scene
where A l Paci no
(Tony Montana) first
meets Michelle Pfeiffer (Elvira Hancock) as she descends
in the glass elevator was filmed inside a mansion on Key
Biscayne. Before it was used for filming, the residence
was owned by President Richard Nixon during his time in
office and dubbed “The Florida White House.” The estate
now sports a private landing pad and the interior has been
left intact since the filming of the movie. The mansion is
currently on the market for an estimated $38.5 million.
The ability for your child to have a positive view of
himself and be successful in life will depend on your giving
and withholding permission for success. Children begin
recording their permissions during the pre-school years.
These permissions are composed by what the child hears,
observes and interprets. A child that hears he or she “can’t
have this” or “can’t have that” will learn that they need to be
content with what they have and not desire more.
Research has shown that a child who receives positive
reinforcement will thrive. Conflicting or unclear messages will
hold the person back until the person is able to figure out why
they feel a certain way. If a child is told that he or she will be
good in everything, the child may want to do many things at
once and never complete any. It’s okay to tell a child they are
good at whatever they try. As they get older, help them decide
what is it that they are good at and have a passion for.
As parents, it is so important to use words like, “You can do
it”; “It’s okay, as long as you tried”; and “You’re incredible no
matter what!” The message needs to be clear: “I love you for who
you are, not what you do.”
› Lisette N. Beraja of Beraja Counseling Center is a Licensed Marriage
and Family Therapist with more than 10 years of experience working
with children, adults, couples and families. If you have a question you’d
like answered in a future edition of Key Biscayne Magazine, email it
to Lisette@Beraja.com. Due to high volume, we will not be able to
respond to all submissions. All names will be withheld to ensure the
privacy of our readers.
119 500 acres
$1 The number of spiraling iron
steps that lead to the top of
the Cape Florida Lighthouse.
The total size of Bill Baggs
State Park in Key Biscayne,
one of the most popular
destinations on the island.
The Indian tribe that burned
the Cape Florida Lighthouse
in 1836 in protest of U.S.
presence in South Florida.
The fee for an entire day of
biking in and around Bill
Baggs State Park.
20 key biscayne magazine