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Success 9 T o 5
Interns always strive to make a good impression in the
hopes of landing a full-time job after graduation. But
what’s really going on behind the perky attitudes and
T E X T BY B I LL L I N D S E Y
ALL WORK, ALL PLAY
Our corporate policy is “Whatever it takes to get the job done.
“Yeah, whatever, I got a social media empire to build in between
CLOCK IN & OUT
Our office hours sometime run well past 5 p.m.
“Oh, that’s cool, the clubs are boring before 11 p.m.”
PAY AS YOU GO
Intern appointments are non-paid positions.
“Uh…what?! You aren’t going to pay me??? Ramen aisle here I come! ”
DRESS TO IMPRESS
We require interns to wear office-appropriate clothing.
“Great! My neon green spandex mini-dress with my leopard pumps
should be perfect! ”
EAT & RUN
You will be allowed one hour for lunch each day.
“No prob, but I’ll need to schedule it to fit in between naps in the copy
room – you do practice siestas around here, don’t you? ”
Although not encouraged, you are allowed 4 cigarette breaks per day.
“Sounds like I’m going to start smoking! ”
We must respect each other’s food in the breakroom refrigerator.
“And this is how Operation Refrigerator Raid begins; if they won’t pay
me, they will feed me.”